The Umbrella People are increasing in number.
I see more and more of them all the time. They walk the streets under their umbrellas and clad in rubber boots that extend all the way up to their hips.
There is no threat of rain. There is no blazing sun. So what, then, are they protecting themselves from?
I put that question to many of the Umbrella People, and I always get the same answer: “Any time now, the sh!t’s really going to start to come down on all of us.”
Doctor-assisted suicide, euthanasia, and the right to die—these topics and more comprise the debate that swirls around one of the most contentious issues of our time.
And now thrown into the mix is a bizarre and growing phenomenon identified through computer analyses of details (reported by municipal health departments and police departments) related to suicides in major American cities post 9-11.
“Super-Assisted Suicides”—or SASSIES as they have come to be known—occur when building superintendents are paid to unlock the doors leading to roof tops, thereby providing suicide jumpers access to statistically the most successful suicide method.
Following the events of 9-11, the combination of changes to federal, state, and local regulations required that most buildings—especially high-rises—in major U.S. cities effectively be “closed up tight.” This obviously put the kibosh on roof jumping. (It is no coincidence, then, that there is an inverse relationship between roof and bridge jumping.)
Every man has his price, and the growing number of building supers that have been successfully prosecuted and jailed have found out that no one will soon unlock any doors for them.
